Idol '78

Okay, I'm talking to the Gen X-ers out there (and older). Do you guys remember the episode of The Love Boat when the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders showed up on the boat? It was a very special episode -- one of the best episodes ever.

Last night's episode of American Idol kind of reminded me of that -- not because it was the best episode ever but because it kind of felt like an episode of the Love Boat from about 1978. With a couple exceptions, things just felt ... dated. I kept waiting for Ryan Seacrest to walk onstage accompanied by the lovely Julie McCoy, who would tell you about all the cool activities planned, while Isaac mixed us a swingin' mai tai. You had Reed Grimm's Ledo Deck take on "Moves Like Jagger." There was Adam Brock's 70s soul-ified "Think." DeAndre Brackensick threw out a falsetto-heavy version of Earth, Wind, and Fire's "Reasons." You had little Eban Frankowitz stripping all the grit and pain from Adele's "Set Fire to the Rain" so that it became an Up With People number. By the end of the night, we had added covers of the Jackson 5, Luther Vandross, and Cyndi Lauper, to name just a few of the moldy oldies trotted out for our enjoyment. And the sad thing is that the performers got to pick their own songs. THEY PICKED THIS STUFF!!!

Thank God for Colton Dixon who gave us a Paramore song that actually felt like something that might be on the radio now. Thank God for Phillip Phillips who took Phil Collins's "In the Air Tonight" and reinvented it for a modern audience. (He's getting the Dave Matthews label, but I also get a nice, healthy Keller Williams vibe from this cat.)

The thing is that there wasn't necessarily anything inherently BAD about last night's performances. In fact, many of them were downright good. They were just downright dated. If American Idol is seeking a relevant artist (a word that Stevie and JLo kept trotting out all night between stints where all three demonstrated how much they had learned at the LA Reid School of Appreciative Music Listening), then they are in trouble if Colton and Phillip aren't voted in. If it's a season of moldy oldies, the show is in trouble.

And maybe it's appropriate. Idol is now the veteran music program. As The Voice and The X-Factor trot out big, splashy production numbers and spinning chairs and songs performed in boxing rings, Idol starts to seem downright conservative and old fogey. If the show wants to stay relevant itself, it needs to push its artists to be relevant. Let them be gay (gasp!), let them tell their stories of redemption through the healing power of music, let them be odd and complicated and passionate. Don't let them die with the music in them!

With that said, here's how I think the voting is going to pan out. My understanding is that America gets to vote through five guys and the judges will pick wild cards from both the men and women to give us a top 13. (Not a superstitious bunch, those Idol producers, eh?) So these are the men I think have been saved by America:

1. Colton Dixon I'm sticking with my prediction that this guy is your winner this year. He's young, he's exciting, he's a "safe" (read: straight) Adam Lambert. I think Colton has a lot up his sleeve that will keep us watching ever week. (PS, though, hate the skunk stripe, bro.)

2. Phillip Phillips Again, this is a guy that's going to keep us entertained. Between his audition "Thriller" to last night's "In the Air Tonight," this guy is a cooler, chiller version of David Cook who will come out there and make every song his own. He's gotta be a sure thing, right? RIGHT?!?!?

3. Chase Likens This one kind of kills me to say since it's a country artist, and I'm sure we all remember my breakdown at the country finale Idol foisted on us last season. As my sis pointed out last night, though, Chase was the only country artist on stage last night. While I didn't particularly like his song (something called "Storm Warning"), his voice itself was pretty decent. And he's cute. And there's a HUGE demographic of tween country fans just looking for a cute new guy to crush on. SIGH! Chase won't make it far (says the woman who predicted Scotty McCreery would crash and burn...), but he surely garnered a lot of votes last night.
4. Joshua Ledet Joshua probably gave the best performance last night with Jennifer Hudson's "You Pulled Me Through." It was pretty damn electric. It might have felt a touch dated (What happened to those big, bombastic soul daddies??), but there was a power and restraint there that was mesmerizing to watch. This guy could solve Idol's "black guy" problem and actually be someone who could go the distance.
5. Jermaine Jones This one, I'm less certain of. It helps that Jermaine has the whole "saved by the judges" story. It helps that he went last. It helps that he has a good voice. (Although between Creighton Fraker trotting out "True Colors" and Jermaine doing "Dance with My Father", I was pretty miserable. Those are two songs I hate more than anything ... well more than anything except No Doubt's "Don't Speak." If one of the girls pulls that crap out tonight, I'm going to start to think maybe Idol is gunning for me, trying to drive me into the arms of Adam Levine -- yes, please! -- and Cee-Lo.) Jermaine also seems like a genuinely decent guy for whom being on that stage was a dream come true. As he finished last night and basked in the applause from the audience, I said to my sis, "You know -- that's what American Idol is supposed to be about" -- giving an average yet talented person a shot at the spotlight. I'm thinking America had the same thought last night.

Candidates for Wild Card Spots:
DeAndre Brackensick I didn't necessarily swoon over him, but apparently the judges thought he was brilliant. He's pretty to look at. That might be enough.

Heejun Han My boy gave one of the weakest performances last night, but a lot of that stemmed from a weak song choice. The judges were keen to point out that he was brilliant despite the song he chose, and they might give him another shot at redemption if American memories don't extend back to the audition rounds....and his adorable cowboy hatred.

Reed Grimm Again, Reed is creative and interesting (the drums are getting a bit old, though, bro) and could give Idol a little cool cred. A little.

The ladies take the stage tonight, featuring three -- count 'em, three! -- country chicks and a buncha chicks who think that a bluesy voice will get them farther than third place. Should be fun!

It's Super Bowl Sunday for Film Nerds

It's one of my favorite nights of the year -- Oscar Night! Tonight, I'll hunker down with my ballot and bask as Hollywood gives itself a pat on the collective back, a night when Hollywood pretends like smart, independent films are its main objective, and try to forget that movies like Transformers and Jack & Jill exist. For a movie nerd like me, it's like Christmas because I, too, get to pretend that I live in a world where people flock to see films like The Artist more than cheesy goo fests like The Vow.

Of course, Oscar night has posed some challenges to me the past couple years. Thanks to -- stop me if you think you've heard this one before -- my packed work schedule and the fact that my local multiplex would rather show Ghost Rider on multiple screens than bring in a smaller film like The Descendants, it's gotten harder for me to see films nominated for best picture, particularly since it often would involve having to drive an hour or more away to find a theatre showing the film I need to track down. And yet, I still get excited as the ceremony draws closer. I still read as many articles as I can about the nominated films. And I still make my own predictions even though I haven't seen as many of the nominees as I'd like.

With that said, here are both my predictions for tonight as well as the nominees I would vote for if I had the chance. (BTW -- Spoilers may be included below, so read at your own risk.)

Best Picture

The Artist

The Descendants

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

The Help

Hugo

Midnight in Paris

Moneyball

The Tree of Life

War Horse

Who will win?: The industry wisdom seems to be that The Artist has this one in the bag. It's a great film, and it's refreshing that a silent, black and white movie can still garner attention in today's landscape filled with explosions and cgi-magic. For the first thirty minutes or so of the film, I thought it was more of a Singin' in the Rain knockoff, but as the film progressed, I felt the story progressed into more of a treatise on our chaotic world. The scene where George Valentin has his noise-filled dream yet is unable to make a noise himself was incredibly moving, and there's no doubt that Jean Dujardin's portrayal of a man facing down the reality of becoming a dinosaur in a world moving on without him is powerful, made even more so in that it is done completely without sound. (And how heartbreaking is the end of the film when we do finally hear Valentin speak in his thick French accent and realize that there is no way he'd be able to have a successful acting career in talking pictures?) Yes, I know The Artist is a pretentious and hypocritical choice, but when has Hollywood ever been anything but pretentious and hypocritical?

How I would vote: As much as I liked The Artist, it wasn't my favorite of the films nominated this year. (I should note that I have seen all of the nominees for best picture except War Horse and Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close.) I thought The Tree of Life was a bit obnoxious, though beautiful to look at. I really liked Moneyball and Midnight in Paris -- films that managed to be both smart and entertaining, a rare commodity in Hollywood some days. I found Hugo absolutely lovely, and The Help was a terrific adaptation of a book I really liked. If I were voting, though, I'd go with The Descendants. This was a spectacular film -- funny, moving, beautifully acted, beautifully written, skillfully directed. I could spend hours talking about how many incredible moments exist in this film. I love how Alexander Payne played with the power of silence in key moments such as the one where little Scottie finds out her mother is going to die or the final scene where Matt and his daughters scatter his wife's ashes in the ocean. I love the depth given to each character, particularly stoner boyfriend Sid. And any movie that makes you believe that a woman would actually cheat on George Clooney with Matthew Lillard is working some pretty powerful magic. Unfortunately, the Academy rarely recognizes films like this as Best Picture, and it's too bad because this is truly a brilliant piece of cinema.

Best Actor

Demian Bichir, A Better Life

George Clooney, The Descendants

Jean Dujardin, The Artist

Gary Oldman, Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy

Brad Pitt, Moneyball

Who will win? This may be the most contested race of the night as Clooney and Dujardin face off. Clooney has won the Golden Globe and the National Board of Review. Dujardin has won the BAFTA, a Golden Globe (The Artist was nominated in the comedy category, The Descendants in drama), Independent Spirit, and the Screen Actors Guild as well as taking Best Actor at Cannes. When you list off the awards, Dujardin has the edge until you factor in that this is Hollywood voting and Clooney is their king. When you consider that this is probably the best acting performance Clooney has ever turned in, and you have to give the edge to Clooney over Dujardin.

How I would vote: I'd go with Clooney, too. There is a complexity to the work Clooney turns in here that needs to be recognized. There isn't a false moment for a second that Clooney is onscreen in The Descendants. Yes, Dujardin's work was moving, but Clooney's was brilliant.

Best Actress

Glenn Close, Albert Nobbs

Viola Davis, The Help

Rooney Mara, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

Meryl Streep, The Iron Lady

Michelle Williams, My Week with Marilyn

Who will win? Streep was kind of a shocker winner at the Golden Globes since critics pretty much decided last summer that Davis would sweep the awards season with her nuanced portrayal of Aibeleen in The Help. I still think it's Davis's to lose tonight. Of course Meryl Streep is brilliant in The Iron Lady -- something I can say without having even seen The Iron Lady. I mean, it's Meryl Streep. Not being brilliant isn't part of her vocabulary. There's no surprise, no revelation in Meryl being brilliant. Viola Davis, though, has rarely been on lists of "great contemporary actresses", so the fact that she brought such depth and tenderness to her work in The Help is surprising and revelatory and can make Hollywood feel like they're discovering something new.

How I would vote: I'd go with Davis, too, although I really loved Rooney Mara's work in The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and I'm sure that the day has to eventually come where Michelle Williams will be more than just an indy darling but a certified star.

Best Supporting Actor

Kenneth Branagh, My Week with Marilyn

Jonah Hill, Moneyball

Nick Nolte, Warrior

Christopher Plummer, Beginners

Max von Sydow, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

Who will win? Christopher Plummer -- no question. I've not seen any of the nominees outside of Jonah Hill, so I can't really comment one way or the other as to whether Plummer's frontrunner status is earned or based more in sentimentality, but the dude has pretty much swept the circuit this season, so why should tonight be any different?

How I would vote: Again, I've only seen Moneyball, so I don't know how I would vote. I will say that Jonah Hill's work was really terrific in Moneyball, and it's unfortunate that he seems to be gravitating to more junk films like 21 Jump Street rather than pursuing more serious work like Moneyball.

Best Supporting Actress

Berenice Bejo, The Artist

Jessica Chastain, The Help

Melissa McCarthy, Bridesmaids

Janet McTeer, Albert Nobbs

Octavia Spencer, The Help

Who will win? This is Spencer's to lose. Her work in The Help was absolutely gorgeous. She gave Minnie such life and depth, life and depth that wasn't always apparent on the page. Here's hoping this lands her more work because Hollywood needs her.

How I would vote: First of all, it's criminal that Shailene Woodley's name is not on this list. Her work in The Descendants was more subtle and nuanced than anyone who had ever watched The Secret Life of the American Teenager would ever think possible. Guys, Amy Jurgens can act!! With Woodley's absence from this list, yes, the easy vote would be for Octavia Spencer, but my personal vote would go with Melissa McCarthy. In a perfect world, the Oscars would recognize that a good comedy can be just as worthy of award recognition as a good drama. The work that McCarthy gave in Bridesmaids was brilliant -- fearless, hilarious, and full of heart. The film itself should have been nominated for best picture, but a win here would be a chance to recognize one of the best films of 2011.

Other predictions:

Best Director: Michel Hazanavicious, The Artist (even though I think Alexander Payne turned in the best directed film of the year).

Best Original Screenplay: Woody Allen, Midnight in Paris -- the most inventive script of the year. I think this will be one area where The Artist won't dominate if only in that it's hard to recognize the script of a film without dialogue. (I'm not going to lie, though -- I'm totally rooting for Kristen Wiig here!)

Adapted Screenplay: Alexander Payne, Nat Faxon, and Jim Rash, The Descendants -- This is where films like The Descendants get their proverbial bone. Look at the history -- some of the great films of the past couple decades have not won best picture but have won a screenplay award -- Sling Blade, LA Confidential, Sideways, The Social Network --many of them films that SHOULD have won Best Picture. (It's even more obvious when you look at the list of Original Screenplay winners.) This is definitely the best script of the year, although props have to be given to Steven Zaillian and Aaron Sorkin for making Moneyball, which is essentially a movie about economics and baseball statistics an engrossing and entertaining film.

Idoling Away

Fear not, friends. My relationship with American Idol is still going strong despite my complete silence on the season thus far. There are several reasons for the lack of commentary. Part of it has to do with my crazy busy schedule that has me working 12-14 hour days and sometimes not catching an episode of Idol until days after its aired when I am able to curl up with my DVR and play catch-up. Part of it has to do with my general ennui where the audition episodes are concerned. The formulaic nature of those first weeks (combined with the fact that multiple episodes air each week) can make it difficult to get too enthused. You fall for a seemingly promising contestant and then never see him/her again save for perhaps a "walk of shame" shot as he/she gets booted out of Hollywood. (I'm looking at you, Ramiro Garcia!) So while I've been watching as faithfully as I can (and I have seen every episode -- just not on the night its aired!), I haven't had the time or the will to focus much in terms of blogging.

I'm sure I'll have much more delightful things to say all season long (and I'll do my best to be timely), but for now...... my predictions for the top 12 based on who is still standing as of the Las Vegas episode (predictions made with the assumption of gender parity in the top 12 -- and listed in no particular order):

1. Baylie Brown -- I remember Baylie from a couple seasons ago and how she was screwed over in Hollywood by nasty Antonella Barba. Baylie is much more polished and assured than she was back in those days and could give Idol the country sweetheart it seems to crave every season (since Carrie).
2. Jen Hirsch -- Right now, Jen is my favorite chick of the lot. That being said, it seems like the odds of a woman winning Idol right now are pretty slim. The tweens are controlling the phone lines, and I can't imagine 13-year-old girls burning up the wires for Jen, who skews much older. Jen needs to hope that the cougars who helped give David Cook his victory over David Archuletta decide it's time for some Girl Power and rally behind the very cool Jen.
3. Hallie Day -- Okay, I keep getting Hallie and Baylie confused every time I see them on the screen, and yet once I tell the two apart, I always tend to like them both. We could be looking at a blond heavy final group of girls here, but the blondes seem to have a slight talent edge this year.
4. Lauren Grey -- I always kind of forget who Lauren is until she sings, and then I'm like, "Oh, yeah. I like that chick." If she can make it to the next stage, that voice may be enough to make voters remember her.
5. Shannon Magrane -- Shannon's amazing performance of "Wonderful World" during Hollywood Week has kept her in my mind even though she's not been highlighted a ton so far this season.
6. Courtney Williams -- I'm not a huge fan of Courtney, but anyone's better than dreadful Brielle Von Hugel -- she of the big ego and the nasty stage mother. Besides, if Idol has taught us anything, it's that it's about "casting" the show, and what would Idol be without a good soul diva? She won't get very far, but she's still a necessary component.
7. Adam Brock -- He's one of my favorites that we've seen so far this season. His jam session with Steven Tyler was the stuff of legends. When you factor in that he reminds me of a less greasy version of Josh Krajcik (from The X-Factor), you have a winner in Mel's eyes.
8. Colton Dixon -- He's definitely getting the story treatment -- rejected last year, had to be cajoled into auditioning while accompanying his sister, his breakdown when his sister was booted from Las Vegas....it's the kind of stuff Idol legends are made of. Right now, Colton might be my pick to win the whole damn thing.
9. Heejun Han -- This guy is clearly the breakout star of the season so far. His disdain for cowboy tyrant Richie Lawson was absolutely priceless -- and has led to the frequent use of "talking craps" about people Chez Mel.
10. Philip Philips -- Phil was my early pick for ultimate winner after his awesome "Thriller" audition in the first episode. I'm not sure if that's still the case (love me some Jen Hirsch ... and see my comments about Colton Dixon!), but the guy is adorable and has been flying just close enough to the radar to maintain a nice trajectory into the top 12.
11. Reed Grimm -- I don't know if he's this season's Casey (as J.Lo dubbed him), but there's something about this guy that I really like. I hope for some Casey/Haley-esque duets between Reed and Jen. Now THAT would be sizzling!
12. Neco Starr -- This is going to sound awful, but....they need a black guy in the top 12, and Neco is my favorite of the ones still standing.

I'm sure there will be surprises along the way, shocking eliminations (I'll be fine as long as Phil, Jen, and Heejun are safe!), and breakouts that seem to come from nowhere, but those are the Idols who have either caught my fancy or seem to be getting the star treatment so far.

Whitney

My generation has lost another one of the heroes of its youth, and while there are plenty of accolades all over the Internet, there is also a lot of backlash, criticizing those paying tribute for canonizing a troubled celebrity who doesn't deserve said-sainthood.

Sigh.

There is no denying Whitney Houston was a troubled soul who made a host of poor decisions in her sadly brief life. Her drug abuse effectively destroyed her legendary voice, and she became yet another butt of the pop culture joke thanks to reality television and interview sound bites. To be frank, I hadn't given much thought to Whitney in quite some time outside of the smile that typically spreads across my face whenever I stumble across her music on the radio.

So why, while driving an activity bus full of teenagers home last night from a speech meet, when I was told about Whitney's death, did I break down in tears? And I'm talking ugly tears.

I'm 40. That's a tough transition to make in your life. My generation is hitting the big 4-0 in a much different way than I think our parents did. There's a youthfulness to this generation that seems to be holding on. My friends still go to concerts, wear pretty stylish clothes, and generally have decided that growing old doesn't have to mean growing up. So when we get these reminders of our own mortality, it can rattle us. For a lot of us, yes, we knew about Whitney's drugs and problems, but when we thought of Whitney Houston, we thought of that cute, smiling young woman asking us how she would know if he really loved her? We thought of that gorgeous closeup of her in the "I Will Always Love You" video, a song a lot of us loved but would never actually claim. To lose one of those icons of our youth is a reminder that youth is actually fleeting and that the time will come when more and more of our heroes will be lost to us. Our pop culture heroes have largely grown old with us. We didn't lose our heroes in droves the way our parents did when they lost Jimi, Janis, and Morrison in the span of about a year. Yeah, we lost Kurt and River young, but look at how many of our heroes are now pushing (or passed) 50 -- Madonna, Bono, Eddie, the Chili Peppers, the Beastie Boys. We've gotten used to the idea that our icons will always be with us -- until they aren't.

Gen-X woke up this morning to a world without Whitney, and the day is going to come when we're going to say good-bye to more and more of those artists who created the soundtrack to our high school and college years. So yes, we practice a little revisionist history on a day like today and hearken back to a time when we were tooling around in our family station wagons blasting "Saving All My Love for You" and thinking that those moments were going to last forever and that we'd always have Whitney to score the important moments of our lives -- our first slow dance, our first breakup, that night driving up and down Main Street staving off boredom with people we thought would be our friends forever. For us, those moments seem like yesterday, but Whitney's death shows us that the years have indeed passed and will continue to pass.

RIP, Whitney. We will always love you.

Merry X-Mas

And so we've reached the end of the X-Factor season. I've been a bit lax in my pithy commentary on the show. Part of it stems from being a bit overbooked at work. Part of it stems from a slip in passion after the eliminations of Drew and Rachel Crow. With the season just an hour away from being over, though, I feel the need to weigh in a little on the show and how this first season has progressed.

For the most part, yes, I do find X-Factor entertaining. The added production value, the mentor-performer relationship, and the seeming realization that this show is supposed to produce viable, contemporary artists has kept me pretty engaged. It's no American Idol, but what show could ever really assume the mantle of that behemoth beauty? It's a good place filler while we wait for Idol to launch in the winter, and it's nice to get a weekly visitation with Simon who is as acidic and prescient as ever. The show has been populated by seemingly likable personalities on the stage and has kept the drama high with the rules that seem to change every week and the elimination of acts that seemed destined for greatness.

And that brings me to some areas where I've found X-Factor lacking. Yes, I know that part of the bread and butter of shows like this is the shocking elimination. It's how they manipulate us to vote and keep us watching, keep us invested. I also, though, think that the way that X-Factor has set up its elimination process is part of the problem. It's hard to have the incentive to vote, for example, when you feel like your voice is muted a little by the ability of the judges to overrule your vote...or when the judges are so stupid in how they decide who to send home. Initially, I did like the idea of the judges ultimately deciding who stays and goes. It seemed like a good safeguard against American stupidity. After all, such a set-up may have given us Melinda Doolittle: American Idol instead of Melinda Doolittle: Who's That Again? Midway through the season, though, the rules seemed to change and double eliminations were foisted upon us. (I suspect it came about the time that Fox executives realized that, if the show eliminated acts one week at a time, they would extend past Christmas and veer dangerously close to the launch of Idol, and no one at Fox wants to piss off Simon Fuller.) All of a sudden, our votes DID count, and artists were picked off heartlessly with little to no fanfare because they garnered the smallest number of votes. And then we had the other two in the bottom three sing for their proverbial lives -- which led to a couple of the more memorable moments in the show's history, but moments that seem more mired in shame than triumph.

First, we had the vote to eliminate Drew over Marcus Canty. I will admit that the judges were right in wanting Drew to mix things up a bit. While I loved her Sarah McLachlan/Kate Bush/Tori Amos sort of vibe, yes, in retrospect, it would have been interesting to see her try something a little more upbeat. And if she had been allowed to stay one more week, we would have seen just that since the next week found the acts have "Dance Week" foisted upon them. The decision to eliminate Drew fell on Paula and Nicole, and the decision they made to keep Marcus just sort of left me flummoxed and made me question the decision to give such power to the judges.

And then came Rachel's ouster. Once again, we had a face off against Marcus. Rachel sang her guts out on her elimination song. She had "star potential" written all over her. And then Nicole made the decision to essentially NOT make a decision, prompting a deadlock which ended with a 14 year old girl collapsing to the floor and sobbing. It was one of the most uncomfortable things I think I've ever witnessed on live television. What made it even more frustrating were the post-show interviews where basically Nicole admitted that her "decision" to go to deadlock was a way to allow Marcus Canty to be eliminated "gracefully." She, like all of us, assumed Marcus was the lowest vote-getter. She, like all of us, assumed wrong. Had Nicole "done the right thing" and voted with her conscience the way every other judge did, Rachel MIGHT have been performing last night alongside those creepy Michael Jackson robots.

And yeah, let's talk now about last night...

Somehow, having a threesome in the finale (tee hee) cuts down on the drama a bit, or is that just me? There's something just more exciting about the big head-to-heads -- Kelly vs. Justin, Clay vs. Ruben, Carrie vs. Bo, Adam vs. Kris. When there are three involved, it just feels muted. Add to it the odd choice to make their first songs duets with actual singers, famous ones, and it felt like X-Factor just had kind of given up a little. While it was exciting to see Alanis, Avril, and R. Kelly singing alongside the X-ers (I really miss calling them Idols, man), it also proved to point out all of the shortcomings in Josh, Chris, and Melanie. Josh is not a rock star, no matter how much Nicole wants to position him to be. He's a bluesman, and a bluesman's voice is not a good match for Alanis's music. (Am I the only one who thinks that they lined up Alanis early in the season when Drew seemed like a lock for the finale??) Chris is an entertaining kid, but again, "Complicated" was really out of his range (and seemingly out of Avril's, too. There's a big difference between what you can sing at 17 and what you can sing at almost 30, isn't there, kiddo?). I liked the insertion of the rap mid-song, but the first verse where he was straining to reach notes was just painful. (What do you think -- was Avril lined up to be Rachel's duet buddy?) Melanie probably held it together the best, but it was on a song that has always made my teeth ache with hatred, so..... there's that.

Mid-show, we got perhaps one of the most bizarre displays and yet one of the most unintentionally metaphoric performances that has ever been on one of these shows. We get these faceless Robotos with money signs dancing while the finalists sang Michael Jackson's "They Don't Care." Faceless robots only concerned with money singing, "All I really know is that they don't really care about us." On a reality talent show. It was kind of spooky in its perfection, and yet I would suspect that not a single person involved with putting that spectacle together ever stopped for a second to say, "Hey, guys, does anyone else find this sort of funny....to have a bunch of previously unknown kids singing about how we don't care about them with the dancing implication being that all we DO care about is money? No? Just me? Okay, cool."

I did find it rather brilliant to have the finalists, for their "$5 million song", sing their initial audition songs. Once it dawned on me, though, that this was happening, I knew that Josh and Chris were screwed. Josh's performance of "At Last" was okay, but it lacked that shock and awe of his audition performance. "Young Homey" was charming as always, but I kind of feel like we've seen that song enough times over the course of the past couple months, that there was nothing particularly revelatory about it. It's a great song, but is it the kind of song you win a $5 million talent show contest with? Probably not. And then came Melanie. We were assured by Stevecrest that the performance order had been drawn at random, but come on! You don't waste "Listen" on first or second. It can only go in the pimp spot, and we all knew Melanie was going to tear that joint down. She's grown as a performer over these weeks, with assurance and poise that she didn't have seven months ago. "Listen" is a barnburner, and I'll frankly be kind of stunned if Melanie doesn't win based on the sheer perfection of that performance being our last performance of the night.

Of course, I've been wrong before. I will say that I think the final two comes down to Melanie and Chris. While I love Josh, I don't think he's been given a chance to really establish his personality and story the way that Mel and Chris have these past several weeks. I also think that he has been held back significantly by his mentor. Baby Nicole's insistence on turning him into a rock star has put Josh in repeated situations where he's seemed downright miserable. The guy has gotten some exposure, will probably land a record deal, and will have a nice career playing larger clubs and opening for Ray LaMontagne for the next couple years. There's no shame in that. Melanie and Chris, however, have been given far better treatment. They were with mentors who seemed to understand the niche that their artists were filling, who understand how to actually make kids into stars, and have hustled on behalf of their artists. They've given us character and backstory galore. They've grown as artists. Chris is probably the more viable contemporary artist, truth be told, but since when did the more viable contemporary artist win one of these things? Melanie is the kind of artist who wins these things. (Is it a coincidence that every time I look at her, I have to squint to make sure I'm not looking at Jordin Sparks or Leona Lewis?) The people who vote for these things are not sitting on the cutting edge of music...or even on the blade of the cutting edge....or the handle....or even in the same drawer. They like their winners filled with big voices and who cares if they can't make it work on the charts. We're stuck in 1992 as voters, and there is nothing 1992 about Chris Rene. Here's hoping LA Reid sticks with Chris after tonight and ushers him to a recording contract that will allow him to build a career. Melanie will be able to coast off her win, perhaps, for a good-selling single or two, maybe even a top ten album debut, and then fade into the same obscurity that awaits Javier Colon (from The Voice) and that has already welcomed Kris Allen and Lee Dewyze.

Again, let me say that I have enjoyed the show as a great filler for Idol. I look forward to next season, a season that I do hope does NOT include Nicole Scherzinger, who has to be the worst judge since Ellen Degeneres. I hope the show examines its formula just a bit and addresses some of those issues that have proved so frustrating -- primarily the inconsistency in terms of voting and elimination. Okay, yeah, a host with slightly more personality might be nice, too, although Stevecrest did kind of grow on me in his awkward sort of way. But I'm not going to lie when I say that I will let out a huge sigh of relief when Ryan, Randy, JLo, and Steve are making their weekly visits to my living room and I can complain about something I have known and loved for so many years rather than the new formula who just isn't quite the same.

The Season of Love and Joy and All That Jazz

Except when it pertains to pickles, Nascar racing, and the music of Justin Bieber, I'm a pretty tolerant person. It's like Depeche Mode said, "People are people." One thing, though, that leaves me feeling pretty darn intolerant is, well, intolerance. And is it just me, or does it seem like intolerance is running pretty rampant this holiday season?

Facebook has been littered with people ranting about "Happy Holidays" becoming a more preferred/recommended greeting this time of year rather than "Merry Christmas." I've been a "Happy Holidays" person for a long time, decades really, much of that stemming from the fact that I have several Jewish friends. My parents always taught me to be considerate of others and not to go out of my way to make them feel bad or left out. I always invited every kid in my class to my birthday parties (even if I didn't like them all), and I wanted to make sure that my friends who were not Christian understood that I wanted their December to be happy, even if their December didn't involve Christmas trees. I love, too, the all-encompassing feel of "Happy Holidays," the fact that it recognizes that this time of year is meaningful for everyone, not just Christians. As I've gotten older, December has become not just about Christmas, but it's about the end of one year and the beginning of a new one, of love and remembrance. And to me, it's important that I include all the people who mean something to me (and even those who don't) in that spirit of celebration -- be they Jewish, Atheist, Muslim, Buddhist, or what have you.

And yet there are people out there becoming downright militant about this "Merry Christmas" thing. Sunday afternoon, my sis was at work. (She's the receptionist at a hair salon.) She was ringing out a woman who had been in getting her hair done, and this woman's friend looked at my sis and said, "Tell her 'Merry Christmas,'" and then proceeded to go on a rant about people who say "Happy Holidays" and how much she hates that. My sis, who told me she typically doesn't offer any holiday greeting at work -- sticking with the tried and true "Thank you and have a nice day" -- gritted her teeth and gave in, wishing the woman a forced "Merry Christmas" even though she told me that she DESPERATELY wanted to say, "Happy Hannukah, bitch. I'm Jewish." (I told her that I probably would have said that. I'm 40. I don't care anymore!!)

I find it kind of ironic that many people are becoming so militant and downright hateful about this. I mean, isn't Christianity supposed to be about peace and love? Wouldn't Jesus be understanding of the idea that there are people out there who believe differently? Um, wasn't Jesus Jewish? So he totally wouldn't even celebrate Christmas outside of the whole "It's my birthday" kind of thing....and doesn't Jesus seem like the kind of guy who wouldn't want to make a big deal out of his birthday?

Listen, I think it's great that Christians are so devoted to their faith and want to celebrate this holiday that is such a meaningful part of their faith. I love me some Christmas, too, but I also think that, during this time of year when faith becomes such a center of many lives, it's a time to really think about what that faith preaches and remember that our world is virtual mulligatawny of faiths. That carrot swimming next to you is a part of that soup even if he is dripping in curry ... or super kosher. Together, we make a great soup, so let's work together rather than spending this season writhing with the indigestion of intolerance.

Happy December, everyone!

Rock Out With Your X Out

So last night was "Rock Week." I've never made a secret of the fact that I'm not particularly fond of Idol's adherence to "theme weeks." I get that it allows for a pool of music, narrowing the choices of a performer, but it also can prove deadly to performers who've found a market and then are asked to fit into a style that's wildly different. (Think Josh Gracin on "Disco Night.") While "Rock Week" is a relatively broad category, it was a bit frustrating last night to see judges ding performers for picking songs closer to their personal styles, songs that could technically be considered "rock" but which weren't, you know, Bon Jovi or something ridiculous like that. To me, rock embraces so much more than heavy guitar riffs and thrashing heads. Rock is just as much about soul and attitude and passion. And so yes, Simon, Bob Marley is a rock artist. And yes, L.A., "Everybody Hurts" is a rock song. So get off your damn high horses, stop griping at each other over petty stuff, and judge these kids on their merits rather than nitpicking over whether they've "cheated" by finding a song that allows them to maintain their artistic identity.

It's becoming clear that there is a definite dividing line emerging amongst the performers with a handful of them pulling away from the pack and another group of them falling further and further behind. Once mighty powerhouses are now seeming weak and desperate as dark horses begin to find their mojo. There's still a tiny (and shrinking) group in the middle trying to decide which part of the race it wants to land in, although my gut tells me that as this "lead pack" gets stronger and stronger (and the weak ones are picked off by America and the judges), those middle performers will start to fade, too.

So how do they stack up? Wait no more, friends.

1. Drew -- U2 is one of my all-time favorite bands. I sat through Rattle and Hum THREE TIMES in the theatre in the course of one week. So I get a little dubious when someone tries to tackle U2 because for me, there is only one Bono and duplicating the power of his voice is nearly impossible. And yet Drew's performance last night was mesmerizing. It gave me chills. "With or Without You" became so haunting. Yes, I, too, was waiting for her to kick in a little there at the end, but I admire Drew for sticking to her guns, for knowing the artist that she is and finding ways to bring that to the stage every week. I can't imagine her voice going uptempo. There are certainly plenty of artists who have stuck within their niche. (There are frequent comparisons online between Drew and Sarah McLachlan. I would encourage Drew fans to also take a listen to Tori Amos and Kate Bush...artists who've worked with the same sort of canvas beautifully for decades without compromising.)
2. Astro -- As soon as they announced it was "Rock Week," my sis and I both were like, "Crap. Astro is screwed." There was no way Astro was going to come out and do Bon Jovi. My prediction was he would go with "Walk This Way" which was that first real mash up of hip hop and rock, but his choice of Puff Daddy's "I'll Be Missing You" was terrific. Turning the lyrics into an ode to old school hip hop was shockingly moving (I teared up. Seriously.) Add to it that last night, for the first time, Astro seemed genuine and even downright humble. The fact that he calls LA and Simon "Sir"...that kid kind of touches my heart. He is smart, he knows who he is, and he could have a future in the business.
3. Rachel Crow -- It's kind of unfortunate that Rachel went so early in the show. Her "Satisfaction" was pretty killer. She was able to play up the bluesyness of that song and still turn out a pretty rocking performance. The problem was that a lot of good stuff came after she did, so it was easy to kind of forget how good she had been by the time some of the others rolled around. Her growth, though, is pretty spectacular, and she maybe puts on one of the best shows of anyone else up there (with the exception of Astro). Plus, it was just nice to see her actually MOVE last night.
4. Josh Krajcik -- Josh was probably the truest rocker out there last night. He chose a current, legit rock band (Foo Fighters) and picked one of their hardest rocking songs ("The Pretender"). I think if I had liked the actual song a little better (I was hoping for "Everlong"), I would have ranked him higher on this list, but Josh is clearly in that lead pack that is jostling for supremacy. Honestly, this top four could be in any order and I'd be fine, and I can't imagine the finale not involving two of these four. The sad thing is that it will only get to be TWO of these FOUR. (PS -- Baby Nicole probably bugged me more here than any other time last night with her ridiculous head banging and rock posturing. Get over yourself, B.N.)
5. Melanie Amaro -- For me, Melanie falls in that middle pack, that pack that has to decide pretty quickly whether it wants to surge and join the lead pack or whether it's content to finish in the middle. There was nothing particularly WRONG with her "Everybody Hurts." It was actually quite lovely. REM is not really a "singer's band". Michael Stipe knew what his voice could and could not do and wrote pretty vocally simple stuff to meet the abilities of that voice. Melanie was able to find some nuance and add some gymnastics that felt organic to the sound and made it her own. The problem is that, while it did have that soaring passage toward the end, it was largely relatively dull. Melanie is a gorgeous TECHNICAL singer, but she lacks that spark that makes Drew, Astro, Rachel, and Josh so unforgettable. At this point, though, I'm having a hard time imagining Melanie finishing better than fifth.
6. Marcus Canty -- The same is true of Marcus. Truthfully, outside of the general showmanship, his performance of Janis Joplin's "Piece of My Heart" (one of my all-time favorite songs) was kind of lackluster. Yeah, he crawled under girls' skirts and shook what his mama gave him, but vocally? Yeah, not so much. The rawness and the passion of that song were completely lost, and it became just a touch Kids, Incorporated for me. That being said, I really like Marcus and think he has the potential to surge up into that lead pack, but he has to find a way to make his vocal energy match his physical energy. Otherwise, he's just a really good back-up dancer who somehow got stuck singing lead because the "real" singer was sick.
7. LeRoy Bell -- If they're going to call out Drew for giving the same performance every week, it's time to call out LeRoy, too. Again, there was nothing technically WRONG with his "We've Got Tonight," but it was dull and just more of the same. I like the guy, but when he's onstage, he just seems a bit lazy. There's a passion missing, and I would not be surprised to see LeRoy in the bottom tonight even though I've got him in the safety zone. (It doesn't help that he had to go first and was completely forgotten by the end of the show. That first slot is a killer at this stage in the game.)
8. Chris Rene -- I am still completely defending Bob Marley as a rock star, and I think it was perfectly acceptable for Rene to pick Marley's "No Woman No Cry" last night. The problem is that it just wasn't all that interesting. The limitations of his voice are becoming more and more apparent as the show goes on, and at this point, his tearjerker story may not be enough to keep him going much longer, especially when there are so many really great performers taking the stage every week. He slips further and further behind every week. The clock is ticking, Chris. Make up your mind. Are you in this to win it, or are you just banking on it to open some doors?
9. Lakoda Rayne -- Even though I am not ranking them last, I would not be surprised to see Lakoda Rayne voted off this week. Their mashup of the Outfield's "Your Love" and Fleetwood Mac's "Go Your Own Way" was shrill and just a mess. Add to it that the attempt to give the girls personality in their introduction video really just made them seem kind of bitchy, and I can't imagine America voting for them. The only way Lakoda Rayne is not in the bottom is if people feel a tremendous surge of loyalty to Paula and vote for them to keep Paula from having a complete nervous breakdown. And it helps that there was one performer significantly worse last night, one performer who absolutely deserves to go home, and that would be ....
10. Stacy Francis -- Holy shit! Talk about a hot mess! I'm not sure I've ever sat through a performance quite so painful. It was like the train crash scene in Super 8 ... only ten times worse. It was shrill and screechy and completely out of her zone. Add to it the fact that my sis and I were completely frustrated that NO ONE called her out on the fact that, essentially, she was doing a Celine Dion song. (Yes, Meatloaf covered "It's All Coming Back to Me" ... AFTER Celine. Yes, the song was maybe technically written FOR Meat. But come on, that's a freakin' Celine Dion song. If they're going to ding Chris Rene for Bob Marley and Melanie Amaro for REM, they need to call Stacy out on freakin' Celine!) In all seriousness, if Stacy is not sent home, America needs to have its ears examined. I was literally cringing watching the whole performance as she hit rotten note after rotten note. It was self-indulgent and out of control. And Stacy had to know that. Thank God the judges last night were willing to be honest with these performers on more than one occasion and tell them that they had made giant mis-steps. (Why LA was so gentle with Stacy, I don't know....she does seem like the kind of chick who would get voted off and then go backstage and blow her brains out, so maybe LA doesn't want that on his conscience. Simon and Paula clearly don't give a shit. Bravo to them.)

Another judge is going to have to be on the chopping block tonight now that Paula is down to one act left. If there's any justice, it'll be Stacy and Lakoda Rayne standing up there (and my fear is that the judges will save Stacy even though her last several performances -- ever since the show went live -- have been mediocre at best, excrutiating at worst), but again, I wouldn't be surprised to see LeRoy there instead of Stacy. (And I could imagine the judges cutting LeRoy loose to spare Paula's psyche for one more week.) But we also know I'm kinda lousy at this whole prognosticating thing, so.......