For Those of You Who Are Fierce, We Salute You

As many of you may know, despite my attempts at culture and pretension, I have many, many guilty pleasures where pop culture is concerned. I personally like to think that I've managed to find a middle ground between high brow and trash. My DVR records both Great Performances and America's Got Talent. That's not to say I don't turn my nose up at things even too trashy for me to find entertainment value in (I'm looking at you, Living Lohan), but I try to not let myself get so mired in high culture that I become, as my sis has accused me of on more than one occasion, snobbier than Frasier and Niles Crane combined. (Oh, what great company, though!)

So it was with great guilty excitement that I stumbled across this first promotional picture for the newest season of America's Next Top Model. I'm sure many of you are thinking to yourself, "Mel watches ANTM? SHOCKING!" Well, I fought Tyra and her Tyra-bots for many, many years until one cold winter afternoon when I was home in bed with a nasty cold and stumbled across a marathon on VH1 and was riveted. This is camp entertainment at its very finest. Drag queens and delusional ex-supermodels and delicious British photographers and girls crying at the drop of a hat AND Janice Dickinson? Who could resist??? I hid my ANTM viewing for quite some time, watching marathons in secret, going to "work" in my bedroom on Wednesday nights to catch the newest episodes. I finally came clean a few cycles ago (the CariDee cycle, for those of you who know ANTM) when my sis caught me in the act of not only watching an episode of ANTM but CRYING while watching an episode of ANTM. She scolded, she mocked, she roared with laughter . . . and then she sat down on the end of the bed and got sucked right in. Bwahahahahahahahahaha!! Both of us are now thoroughly and unabashedly hooked. We watch, we mock, we place bets on winners, and we cry every damn season when the new winner is announced. You shoulda seen the tears when "fattie" Whitney won last season. Our addiction is so serious that when I was at Wal-Mart, I called my sis screaming with tears of joy to tell her that Whitney's CoverGirl ad was on display.

So the new season will be starting shortly. Who will be this season's bitch (ala cycle 9's loathed Bianca who was recently arrested for getting into an airport brawl with Hairspray's Nikki Blonski)? What will the pressure be like on this season's token plus-size girl now that one of them has won the crown? Who will have the sob story that will keep us on the edge of our seat? Who will be the early favorite who will be sent home shockingly early (ala last cycle's Claire)? Only time will tell. But I will most definitely be there watching the debut -- about 30 minutes late so I can fast forward through the commercials courtesy of DVR.

For those of you who share my ANTM love (and you don't have to admit it), be sure to check out fourfour each Monday during the season. Rich writes the hand's down funniest recaps of ANTM EVER. I can only dream of being as clever and witty as Rich.